Friday, 20 February 2015

Liber Azag: Book of Sigils, part 4

Servitors
It's time to speak about servitors and their use in Sigil Magick. A word servitor was originally intended to mean any kind of entity, from an elemental being to a demon. Modern definition is an artificial entity created by the practitioner, but I personally prefer the original meaning so I will use it more broadly in this book. One of the reasons is that Sigil Magick would be too limited if you didn't know how to apply its philosophy to modern and traditional systems of Magick, Spare's original intention was to re-discover Magick in its purest state, not to create an independent system that's not compatible with the rest.

So, what is a servitor? Servitor is a type of non-physical lifeform with some level of consciousness and intelligence. The biggest difference between a servitor and a sigil is the working mechanics. By using a sigil, we can shift a probability to our advantage, but if the gate is closed, our desire won't be fulfilled. A servitor that is given a task makes conscious decisions to meet its goal and when there is no apparent gate to the goal, it can learn about how to climb the wall or lockpick the door. In other words a servitor can learn new things to meet its goals. Servitors are also suitable for more complex tasks where a couple of factors have to be manipulated or when we search for something, servitors are e.g.  good finders of rare occult books.

Before we speak about how to create our own servitors, let's take a look into those already existing, there is a good number of grimoires consisting of countless spirits ready for our use. Grimoires are like phone book, you get a spirit's name, seal, correspondences and descriptions of its abilities including means of summoning these. It is great to have a set of entities one can work with, just remember that most of these are egregores, entities created by a great deal of practitioners and worshippers during the ages and their consciousness is usually culturally specific. For example when an entity was crafted by a blood cult, it will require you to sacrifice blood as an offering or if the spirit is specific to some hidden tradition, it will require you to be initiate of that same tradition. I say this because many egregores come from Goetia where it is normal to threaten the spirit with God's wrath to comply, and some of these spirits really need this behavior to work. On the other side some of the Goetic spirits are deities from much older religions and treating them like God's servants will bring some unfortunate consequences, if the egregore was created while being worshipped as a god, you shouldn't threaten it like a hobo wanting some spare change, enough said.

So, we know there are some pre-made servitors, but where? You can pick from Goetia, Clavicula Solomonis, Faust's grimoire, Grimorium Verum, New Avatar Power, Simon's Necronomicon and many many more. I personally prefer Necronomicon but I worked with others before. You can off course follow rituals and procedures as described in these grimoires (Necronomicon's spellbook, second book of Necronomicon, has a pretty nice and straightforward ritual) or you can take Spare's approach and use gnostic practices to contact the spirits, death postures used over the seals is an especially effective method of conjuring the entity). You can also try to put a seal of an entity under the black mirror, think about the seal while performing the death posture and on the verge of excitatory gnosis look into the mirror.

When speaking about conjuration, we should also mention the most amazing way of doing so with Sigil Magick, meeting spirits in dreams. As easy as sigilizing I WANT TO MEET A SUCCUBUS IN MY DREAM and charging it. By the way, the dream state spirit work is the only one where you want to use beginnings of the desire like THIS MY WILL, I WISH or I WANT TO. Reason is that servitors have their own consciousness and intelligence and you rather request them to come than commanding them. You also want to avoid this to be permanent, who would want to meet succubi in each of his dreams and always wake up tired? Just few hints, before working with spirits in your dreams you should practice a dream recollection first. Simply repeat I REMEMBER ALL MY DREAMS as a mantra till you fall asleep or sigilize it and use the sigil before going to sleep, a charged sigil can also hang on the wall just above your bed to increase its effects. Speaking of working with entities, you can sigilize the I WANT TO MEET THE SPIRIT IN MY DREAM in a fashion of a circle, then you just put the seal or sigilized name of the spirit inside the circle and charge it. This way you save time and also each of your dream evocations will be more and more successful.You can do the same with remembering all your dreams and make it as the outer circle for the dream spirit work. So, in the end you will have a seal of a spirit enclosed in a circle saying you want to meet that spirit in a dream and that will be enclosed in another circle stating you remember all your dreams. These circular, rectangular or triangular hollow sigils are used  by practitioners quite frequently, they just don't speak much about it. But we can of course find these in traditional magick as well, magick circles and triangles of evocation are hollow sigils. Same goes to planetary intelligences, if we have e.g. a mercurial spirit, we will enclose its seal within an octagon, because 8 is a number of Mercury in Chaldean sequence (more about it in Astro Magick Essentials).

While still speaking about pre-made servitors it is also worth to mention something. A servitor doesn't need to be only invoked or evoked, the biggest beauty of servitors is their multi-functional use. Let's say you pick some entity from a grimoire that has some ability or knowledge that you want. We have already spoken about Goetia so let's use some goetic entity as an example, let's speak about Marbas. Marbas is a expert in healing and mechanical arts. A healing, meaning an ability to heal others and improve's one own health dramatically, that is useful skill. Mechanical arts doesn't mean only small geared machines, it's general for household work, when you need to fix anything from a clogged toilet up to the electricity problems, Marbas is the entity for that. Now tell me, what handy man would refuse such a gift, an ability to fix nearly anything and an unique mentality of solving problems that only Marbas can give to you? Everything without a need to even evoke this entity. How? If we read Goetia, we will find out that each antity has a name, a seal, description and correspondences. These all are sigils. All we have to do is to draw Marbas' sigil on the paper and use it regularly for focal meditation to suck in his characteristics. Of course death postures with intention to do so will have the same effect. We can also strap his seal to a piece of thread and use it as a talisman or amulet of sorts. Now comes the beautiful part, we can be really creative, take a piece of wood or metal, engrave his seal on it charge it and use that as your talisman, or use his seal as a latte art, charge it and then drink it. Or go old school, charge his sigil on a piece of soft paper, charge it, then let the paper dissolve in water or tea and then drink it. There is really no limit stating how you can or cannot work with servitors and their sigils. You can also draw Marbas' seal on your body with a pen, best directly on the wounded area or on the chest right in front of the heart and use this as a centering and magnifying gateway for your healing, or draw it on the body of the sick person you wish to heal.

To create your own servitor you have to specify his goals first. Should the servitor be a one-time type for a specific task or should he be the multi-use type? In case of one-timers you have to specify an expiration for the servitor, whether when the task is finished or in some reasonable time frame. Let's make an example of a servitor now. Let's say I want my servitor to aid me in meditations, clarity of mind and ability to make correct decisions. What shape could be the best for such a purpose? The servitor can be short as there is no need for him to rush anywhere, he should have long white beard representing wisdom and mystery. He should have a scroll or parchment, representing wisdom and knowledge, also some form of pen or feather, representing writing notes and writing definite decisions. We can use parchment for the written notes and scroll for a gained knowledge, scroll should probably be on his back to make it ready for use, parchment and feather should be in his hands. When the purpose and ideal form of the servitor is decided, we should take some time visualizing the servitor and our communication with him/her to make sure this combination is really what we want. Remember that when we do a mistake now, our servitor will be less able to accomplish his future tasks.

Next we should create the name and activation formula for our servitor. Let's use his set of abilities as a desire statement:
MEDITATION INSIGHT DECISION MAKING CLARITY

Let's erase all vowels and repeating letters now:
MDTNSGHCKLR

Turn it into a sigil mantra:
MADATAN SIGI HOCEK LIER

Now we can either turn his mantra into a word of power to gain his name or we can use the original desire statement for this. From mantra it would be MASIHOLI and from the statement MEINDEMA. I personally like MEINDEMA more.

As the next part we should create a seal of our entity to have some nice focal point for meditations. We can either sigilize the name, mantra or the desire statement, choose what you like. We can also use any method of sigilization we like. Frankly, our MEINDEMA possesses a lot of Mercurial qualities, so let's use the square of Mercury to create his seal.

Once we have the description, form, name, mantra and seal, we are pretty much ready to create our very first servitor, easiest way to do so is to use his seal for focal meditation while vibrating his name and his mantra. Coincidentally this is also the method we will use on regular basis to feed our servitor. And, because our servitor is meditation based, this process will also automatically become easier for us as the time goes and our artifical spirit grows in power, everything depends on the practice. It is also a good experience to visualize the form of your servitor and repeat his name a couple of times when falling asleep. This way you can call your servitor into your dreams and get to know your creation. Servitors also like to lurk around a lot, so if you share a bed with your partner, it can happen that the very next day your fiance will describe a very strangely looking creature from his/her dreams that will be suspiciously similar to your servitor. This happened to me the very day I have created my very first servitor, a fox-like creature named Erlis, the morning after that my wife has told me about her dream where I was sleeping while leaning back on a tree and a weirdly looking "dog" was protecting me against something. She described the "dog" exactly the way I built Erlis to the closest detail and she didn't even know about my little experiment with servitor creation.

It can happen that your servitor creation won't work the way you would expect and the spirit will be too weak or too vague to even communicate. Sometimes this happens. The very usual reason is that our unconsciousness didn't join the separate pieces like name, mantra and seal together, so they exist separately, but do not enhance each other. In fact it can even happen that these separate pieces will negate each other. This situation tends to be very troublesome, often even annoying. Fortunately there is a quite quick and easy fix for that. Write servitor's name and mantra on separate pieces of paper, draw his seal on another piece of paper and you can also draw your servitor's form on yet another piece of paper. Once you did that put all pieces together and secure them with a piece of thread. Once that is finished, simply burn them together. Occult lodges usually use this method to associate your real name with your name given to you by the lodge. The basic belief is that this way your name and your lodge name does merge together on astral level, as you can see the very same thing can be done as a quick fix in case of servitor creation. What also helps is to visualise your servitor right next to you during the day, imagine that your servitors are always with you, all the time, they are sitting right next to you in bus, they are attending the same meetings as you are, they are walking right by your side, etc. And when you are already visualising that, remember to talk to them in your thoughts. This helps to develop a relationship with your creation. Sometimes when you are communicating with your servitors, they will talk back to you. People tend to role-play a bit in this case so they are just chatting with themselves thinking they speak with their own creation, but once your creation really talks to you, you will be able to easily differentiate that from your internal voice. Servitors also tend to develop a sort of personality unique to them. This personality will also affect your visualisations and your inner talks with them. Their personality will also affect the way they do things, they will develop a very specific personal style of their own. This style will have some resemblance to your own, after all you play a creator in this process, and the same way as your servitor is affecting your thoughts about him, same way you are affecting your servitor's personality. This is also one of the reasons why some egregores are hard to work with, there is a big cultural gap between you and their "creators". This gap makes it a bit hard to decide, you either have to work with old and powerful entity but with cultural problems, or make your own entity that will be easier for you to work with, but results will be harder to achieve due to the age and inexperience of the servitor.


So far we have described only permanent servitors, but what about those limited by time or by task accomplishment? This information can be part of the desire statement, simply adding ONE WEEK, ONE MONTH or TILL something IS ACCOMPLISHED should do the trick. There is only one problem with this scenario, the time needed for the task won't fit the expiration date of the servitor or if the servitor becomes too intelligent, he will figure out not doing the task will prolong his existence. But there is a simple solution to the problem, create a permanent servitor for a specific task and when the task is finished, simply dissolve the servitor. Easiest way to do this is the burning method described before, simply write servitor's name, mantra and draw the seal all on one piece of paper and your name on another piece. Tie these two pieces together and burn them,  merging the servitor back into yourself. The very same thing can be done with various other methods, including a ritual to draw all already created servitors back, we will speak about these methods later, for now it is important that you know the basics of servitor creation, manipulation and dissolving.

Friday, 13 February 2015

Liber Azag: Book of Sigils: part 3

Different methods of sigilization
Let's speak about few different methods of sigilization now. In the beginning I have mentioned 3 basic methods used in Sigil Magick: Meshing letters together, pictorial method and automatic drawing. These 3 methods were used by Spare and are commonly used by Sigil Magicians across the globe. There is nothing wrong with these methods, but we must understand is that these methods are quite modern. If we go back into the past, into the history of Magick, we will find much older methods of sigilization. These methods can also be used in the modern Sigil Magick.

First of all we have the Nine Chambers system. In this system we have a table with 3 rows and 3 columns, giving us a total of 9 cells. In each cell there is a set of letters, outer border of the table is non-existent, giving us a variety for the sigilization.

To create a Nine Chambers we can use a common numerology system, where we write numbers 1 to 9. Under each number we then write a letter of the alphabet, A under 1, B under 2, C under 3, D under 4, etc. When we finish writing a letter under 9, we then continue writing under letter A.

Once this is finished, we have a set of letters and their numeric representation. Now we draw the table for Ine Chambers and letters under number 1 goes to the first cell (first row, first column), letters under 2 go to the second cell (first row, second column), till the whole table is finished.

To use Nine Chambers, we simply cross out all repeating letters in our desire statement and then we follow the letters one by one in the table, except of drawing the letter, we draw the outline of its cell, meshing these outlines together as we go. This makes our sigils a little bit less original, but we don't need to spend too much time with our artistic side and due to the limited variety of shapes it is much easier to mesh these outlines together to make a sigil. This is the Aiq Beqar (nine chambers) method.

Next method we can speak about is the Rose Croix method. This method is really simple, you just take the rose croix and connect the letters on it in the sequence matching with your desire statement. These connected lines then represent your sigil. It is quite unclear what's the true origin of the rose cross in this particular design, it officially appeared in Golden Dawn but of course a much older heritage was claimed. What is not ancient in the systems of traditional magick like it wasn't worth the effort. It's partially due to the human nature, trying to find the lost wisdom of ancient races, partially also caused by the arrogance of members of these "ancient" lodges. But this method is used quite often and there actually exist even variations, Here is one from the TOHO order:

Another system we can speak about uses the planetary Magick square. I have described this method very deeply in the Astro Magick Essentials, so I will be rather give a summary here. It is believed that there are cosmic energies affecting our little planet and these cosmic energies can also be used to enhance our Magick if we follow a set of rules and observe the stars and planets to find out which energies are currently available for us to use. Planets we normally observe are Sun, Moon, Mars, Mercury, Jupiter, Venus and Saturn (yes, in astrology Sun and Moon are considered planets). A certain occultist named Agrippa has derived a set of Magick squares for these plaets to be used for sigilization, namely to derive signature of intelligences and spirits of these planetary energies. But what else is a signature than a sigil?

First of all we need a conversion table between numbers and letters:
  1. A: 1
  2. B: 2
  3. C: 3
  4. D: 4
  5. E: 5
  6. F: 6
  7. G: 7
  8. H: 8
  9. I: 9
  10. J: 10
  11. K: 20
  12. L: 30
  13. M: 40
  14. N: 50
  15. O: 60
  16. P: 70
  17. Q: 80
  18. R: 90
  19. S: 100
  20. T: 200
  21. U: 300
  22. V: 400
  23. W: 500
  24. X: 600
  25. Y: 700
  26. Z: 800

Now, let's say we want to create a sigil for money, then we create our desire statement:
I ATTRACT A LOT OF MONEY
then we cross out all repeating letters:
IATRCLOFMNEY
Now let's convert it into numbers:
9, 1, 200, 90, 3, 30, 60, 6, 40, 50, 5, 700

Now we want to use a planetary Magick square of Jupiter, as our request is money related. But if you take a closer look then this square contains 16 as its biggest numbers so some of our numbers do not match. For that purpose we have to cut down zeroes to the point when our numbers match:
9, 1, 2, 9, 3, 3, 6, 6, 4, 5, 5, 7

Now our numbers match but some repeating in the sequence. When you have one number twice in a row (e.g. 6,6), you make a mark on the number, usually a small arc. It is also a good custom to start the sigil with a small circle and end it with a dash.

Here I am going to give you a list of planetary correspondences and their Magick square so you know which square is good for which outcome. Squares themselves are also symbols so their understanding is part of Sigil Magick, this is unfortunately out of the scope of this book, still, if you are interested about what these squares represent and how to build them, I can only recommend you to read my book named Astro Magick Essentials where you have all the information about these squares and how to create them that you will ever need, with both traditional squares as described by Agrippa and their modern versions made by me.

Alphabet of Desire
It's time to speak about the AoD, the final stage of A. O. Spare's system, the beauty of Sigil Magick and the most powerful tool of al sigil magicians. AoD, as we mentioned earlier is a set of re-usable sigils that can be combined together to create new ones. This explanation sounds kinda interesting, but what does it really mean? With AoD you create your own set of correspondences, these correspondences can then be used even outside the scope of Sigil Magick. As we said before, a sigil can be anything from a symbol to the position of the whole body, it can actually be a combination of one or more of these. Now, if you ever tried Rune Magick, you would see a similarity here, as each rune has its own meaning, it also has a sound, a gesture and a position of a body. Visual depiction of runes is usually used for divination, body positions are used for meditation and gestures are used for spell casting (together with its sound). With AoD you can easily re-invent the whole Rune Magick and obtain a system that is good for meditation, divination and spell casting, also creation of charms, talismans, amulets, as I said before, this is a complete system of Magick on its own.

To start with the creation of AoD we first need a set of opposite emotions, of dualities. Write down as much as you can in a following format:
  1. Love - Hate
  2. Anger - Passion
  3. Fear - Courage
  4. Happines - Lust
  5. Luck - Poverty
  6. Nudity - Security
  7. ...

Write down as much as you can, any pair of whatever seems to be dual opposites to you based on your subjective feeling. This AoD is yours and yours only, fit it for yourself. Once our list is finished, we can proceed to the next part, remember if at any time you figure out another pair of duality, you can always add it later. For the next part we now take each word from the pairs and sigilize it, using our favorite method of choice, so you make sigils for LOVE, for HATE, for ANGER, till you have sigils for all of your "emotions". Once sigils are finished, we should pre-charge them, we can either use a death posture for each of the sigils or we can use each sigil for a focal meditation while we mentally invoke and experience its emotion. That means that during focal meditation on e.g. LOVE you try to feel the love during the whole operation, this is all the pre-charging that is needed.

After the pre-charging is done, we ca try to use our AoD for the first time. Build your desire statement from the emotions from AoD and then either merge the sigils together into one big sigil or write/say/draw/use them in a sequence, building your very first sigil sentence. You can either use your AoD in the archaic manner, then all you need will be your basic AoD, or you can sigilize new words, verbs and nouns, expanding your AoD. This expansion is not limited to words only, whole phrases can be used for sigils if this can make your work easier. For example when I still used THIS MY WILL as the beginning of my desire statements, I had it ready as just one sigil in my AoD so I could built my formulae very quickly. It is also fair to say that if you use mudras (gestures) or asanas (body postures) as your AoD sigils, you should draw some archaic depictions of these as a reminder of what is what. It is also fair to say that more you use your AoD in your work, more powerful it gets as each use of your sigils will charge them, making them stronger. Now, if you used the very same method, but instead of drawing your sigils, you would carve them into a wood or metal, you could easily create a persistent holder of their energy, a charm of sorts. Same goes to amulets and talismans, only difference is their purpose. A charm is for luck, amulet for protection and talismans are to bring fourth something into your life, whether love, money, fortune. Just choose right sigils and engrave them into their holder. The holder can be made from wood, stone, metal or wax and can also be artistically shaped and decorated to enhance its "mystical" value. In other words more "magickal" the holder looks, more easily you will be able to charge it after sigils are engraved.

The next we should describe how to use AoD for divination purposes. For this use we will need our sigils on a separate pieces of paper. These pieces should be small enough to be easily manipulated. Certain companies like Bicycle sell blank cards, these are perfect for our occult endeavors, but whether you choose paper, stones, pieces of wood or blank cards, the output is same. Simply shuffle the deck, select a couple of cards at random with your left hand and place them into a spread just like if you did with tarot cards. Simplest spread contains 3 cards, for past, present and future. If you intend to use these cards purely for divination, you can also write the "emotion" word under each sigil, making the interpretation easier. To learn about more spreads that can be used, read my book named Liber Azag: The Book of Tarot. If you omit the word of sigil on cards, having purely sigils on your cards, you can easily use these cards to create your sigil statement, just placing down cards you want and using them for dynamic charging or death postures, this is the fastest and the most ultimate way of spell casting, always ready to use as long as you have your AoD deck with you.

So far we have described how to create our Alphabet of Desire and how to use it for spell casting, talisman creation and divination. What are other uses? Well, you can also use AoD for scrying. A sigil built from a statement I SEE THE FUTURE can be easily used for focal meditation to bring forth the visions of future. This sigil can be also placed under the black mirror or built directly within the frame of the blac mirror to enhance its power, aiding in black mirror's ability to see the Astral and bring visions.


AoD can also be used to attain power, statements like I AM VERY POWERFUL MAGICIAN turned into a sigil can be used repeatedly to enhance one's own Magickal potential. Now, if such a sigil existed as a visual sigil, mantra, gesture and posture, you would gain a very nice meditative ritual for a self development. Speaking of that if each of your sigils also contained a word of power, you would get your own very effective Magickal language even with its own alphabet, add gestures and postures to it and use it on regular basis and you will one-handedly overpower any rune magician as the AoD will be your very own, not borrowed from some distant culture.

Monday, 9 February 2015

Liber Azag: Book of Sigils, part 2

There are also several other ways how to use sigil mantras, some are simplified version of what was already said so I don't feel the need to go through them. What I would like to do right now is to slip out of the psychology paradigm and jump right into the energy paradigm, for that purpose I will explain the basics mechanics of elementalism, broad enough so it can be used in the following case but not broad enough to waste the space here. If you want a better and more in-depth understanding of elements, I recommend to read other of my books called Condensed Magick 101, in the Theory part there I give a very complex explanation of elements

The basic belief is that everything consists of 4 elements: fire, water, air and earth. Fire is associated with Will, Water with emotions, Air with intellect and Earth with physical reality. These elements all origin in the primal element called Akasha. According to the story first elements that emanated from Akasha were Fire and Water, but because these two negate each other, another element was needed, Air, to put a distance between the two. Last emanated element was Earth, Earth emanated to limit all 3 previous elements.

Traditionally we associate elements with these colors:
  1. Fire: red
  2. Water: blue
  3. Air: yellow or white
  4. Earth: green, black or brown
  5. Akasha: Purple or violet

Let's now speak about the Akasha element and its use for mantras. We know tha everything emanates from Akasha, so it's a good to go element to cause change on various levels as opposed to other elements. For example Air is good for improving your memory, but not as good to force you to exercise more often. Akashic fluidum can also be "programmed", charged with an intent with a method we are going to learn in just a moment.

  1. So, start by relaxing your whole body in a calm environment like during the previous sigil mantra exercise, get to the point when you can hear Nada. Then imagine the whole universe consists of a purple/violet fog, visualize yourself in the midle of this endless fog.
  2. Now start repeating your mantra in your mind, feel how the Akashic element is full of the mantra, of its purpose, of its meaning.
  3. Now with each inhale visualize how Akasha together with this intention enters your body, how it fills you with the mantra itself. And with each exhale vibrate your mantra out loud.
  4. Keep repeating step 3 for a couple of minutes, concentrating the Akasha in your body more and more, making the Akashic light getting thicker and thicker within your body.

As you can see from the described process, this method is useful for manipulation of the self, but how about affecting the outside reality? Easy enough, instead of attracting the Akashic fluid into yourself, visualize it entering the desired object or person (or, of course, a sigil of what you want to charge). This method can be also used to charge fluidic condensers and Magickal items like wands, daggers, mirrors, pantacles, etc.

Other sigils
We have already talked about visual and oral sigils, or more precisely we have spoken about how to specify your desire and sigilize it, either into a symbol or a mantra. We have yet to speak about gnosis, the last needed part to let it work, but for now let's speak about other types of sigil, because a sigil is much more than a drawing or a sequence of sounds. The main power of Sigil Magick comes from the very definition of a sigil. A sigil is a symbol associated with our desire, with what we want to accomplish. We can associate gestures with our intent, these would be called a Sigil Mudra, or even full body postures (Sigil Asana). For a sigil you can also use a certain breathing pattern (Sigil Pranayama).

Later in this book we will speak about the Alphabet of Desire and its applications, but for now let's just define it as a set of sigils for different purposes which you combine together for a certain outcome. Now imagine that your sigils were only gestures, postures and breathing patterns, then building your spell would look like a dance or a karate kata. Actually, a sigil doesn't need to be static at all, do you know the modern version of a circle casting when a caster turns clockwise while point with his finger forward and visualizing how a colored circle is being drawn by that finger? That whole act itself is a sigil with a quite clear desired outcome, protection during the ritual (even when most traditional systems use circles rather as a lighthouse that spirits can use as a navigation mark to get to your ritual).

If you take the definition of a sigil to its final conclusions, you will notice that even Wiccan rituals or Ceremonial Magick rituals can be considered as sigils or a set of sigils and it actually makes sense. Take it this way, you turn off all electrical lights, light up candles, you cleanse the space, cast a circle... That's all associated with "there is something going on". Then you call to your deities, that's like saying "I want to do Magick right now", then you do things to seal the deal, you request help from the entities, you give offerings, stuff like that, that's when you state what your actual desire is. Finally, you go for licensing to depart, cleansing the space again, hiding ritual items, once again a huge association: "My ritual is finished, back to the mundane now".

As you can see, each act in Magick can be stripped into its general meaning and that means that the act itself works based on its association with its meaning, just like the association between a sigil and a desire. Sigils themselves can be used for the very same thing, replacing a different portions of rituals. The interesting part is that you cannot do different parts of the ritual at the same time, but sigils can be meshed together and used as one, saving time for the preparation and also execution of your work. I don't want to go too in-depth on the matter as this is basically what we are going to do in a chapter focus on the Alphabet of Desire.

Other famous type of a sigil is a so called Hyper Sigil. This term was coined by a great artist, Grant Morrison. Generally a hyper sigil can be a book, a song, or even a whole album, it's a work in which you describe what you want to achieve. Morrison's first hyper sigil was his comic book, Les Invisibles, in which he pretty much lined up his own life through the story and actions of one of the characters, a bold headed, leather jacker wearing badass. Needless to say that this method worked great for Grant as is apparent from his life story, maybe even from his own appearance, he also became a bold headed, leather jacket wearing badass.

Gnosis
It's time to speak about gnosis. Gnosis, traditionally speaking, is a term that can be defined as a divine revelation A state in which one does no longer need to believe in something as the true nature of the universe was already revealed to him. In Sigil Magick and Chaos Magick this term has a little bit different meaning. In these paradigms a gnosis means a state of the mind when all the mental chatter is stopped and psychic censor is deactivated. We divide between two forms of gnosis, inhibitory gnosis and excitatory gnosis.

Inhibitory gnosis is achieved via meditation. This state is easy to control and lasts for a longer period of time. Unfortunately achieving this state takes a massive amount of time and practice

There is a simple description of meditation for this reason, remember a practice makes perfect:
  1. Sit in a comfortable position and relax your whole body.
  2. Close your eyes and focus on your breath, focus on the rhytm, be sure that inhales and exhales take the same amount of time, keep focusing on your breath and how inhales fills your lungs till it is the only thing you are aware of, as if the breathing was the only thing in the universe.
  3. Then stop focusing on your breath, till that disappears too, now you should be in a state with no mental chatter and no pereception of the outside world.
  4. Say to yourself: "I will now count from 20 to 1 and when I reach one, I will enter the state of trance needed for performing Magick".
  5. Count from 20 to 1.

As you can see, reaching the inhibitory gnosis is not easy, even people experienced in meditations will have hard times reaching the state. But once you reach the state, you can actually make an anchor there to reach the gnosis easier next time. For that purpose you can e.g. select a gesture (or any type of sigil, really) and state that next time you use this sigil, you will enter this state of the mind. Then whenever you need to reach gnosis, you simply use the sigil you have chosen and while you are doing that, you will count up to 20 deep inhales, after that voila, you are there. The anchoring sigil really does make the job easier, you just need to do it properly the first time and set up the sigil.

Excitatory gnosis
Because the inhibitory gnosis is hard to achieve, we should also mention the excitatory gnosis, which uses "external" stimuli to get us into the desired state. This state is less controllable and fades much faster, but it will make the work done. Very first type we should speak about is drug induced. Many chaotes use drugs to achieve the desired state, and whether we are talking about DMT, Ahayusca, LSD, witch's flying ointment or any other, I do not recommend using drugs at all. I personally did smoke a mixture of herbs and during that time I had few nearly successful astral projections. Nearly successful because I always stopped the projection in the middle and then tried my best to stay in the body with all my Will. The point was that the projection was nearly uncontrollable and in that state I really didn't want to appear on a totally unknown plane with no assurance that I would even be able to return to my body, so I say it now as clearly as possible: DO NOT USE ANY DRUGS.

Let's now speak about the easiest (and most pleasant) way how to get into the excitatory gnosis: masturbation. During the state of orgasm your mental chatter stops for a moment and your psychic censor shuts down, if at that time you see your sigil or you at least visualize it, it will get planted to the unconsciousness. You of course can also use gestures during masturbation, just remember to use the "other hand". Mantras are generally not used with this method, instead you shorten it to the word of power and keep it in your mind or yell it out loud with your whole lung capacity during the orgasm.

When using the excitatory gnosis it is also important to forget all about the sigil and desire as soon as possible. The reason is that a psychic censor, once it is reactivated might try to interrupt the work once it is noticed. For that purpose you can banish banish with laughter. Right after you enter the excitatory gnosis and charge your sigil, you then quickly close your eyes and start laughing as hard as possible, at the beginning the laughter will be forced, but after some time it will turn into a real maniacal laughing, during that you can also dispose of the sigil so you won't see it once you stop laughing, if your sigil is drawn on a paper simply flip the page and when it is in your notepad simply close it. Once you stop laughing, it is highly advised to start doing something else, some food or some cleaning, to keep you busy in the mundane world. Sometimes the sigil and desire reappears in your mind, simply start thinking about something else or recharge the sigil. The best method how to really forget about the sigil is to expect no result at all, if you keep striving for the results you are giving your psychic censor a space to affect or even nullify the outcome and that is something we should avoid because we want our desires to be fulfilled.

We have described a basic way how to enter the gnostic state and also described how to banish with laughter. Keep the banishing with laughter in mind, it must be used right after each charging with the excitatory gnosis. Now let's speak about different ways how to achieve the gnosis. As we have already said, an orgasm is one way to do it, but you can also use over-breathing, breath deprivation, sensory deprivation, spinning, muscular over-extension, orgasm deprivation, sleep deprivation or any combination of the aforementioned. Practices using these methods are commonly called Death Postures. Death postures are quick ways how to reach the excitatory gnosis, some of them are more dangerous and some are less dangerous, I will explain mainly those that are pretty safe and I will only merely mention those that can seriously injure you, both physically and mentally.

First let's start with a simple and traditional death posture. For this one you want to sit down in a chair with a table in front of you. Your sigil can be placed on the table, in case of words of power or gestures, you of course want to use them during the gnostic state, with this being clear I will continue describing the version for visual sigils. Sit on the chair and rest your elbows on the table, your sigil should be ideally placed right between the elbow or it can also hang on the wall right in the front of your eyes. Take a deep breath and keep holding it while you use your hands to block your eyes, ears and nose. Keep this position and keep holding your breath till you cannot keep any longer and then hold it till you really can't any longer. The fun fact is that you cannot choke yourself, in the worst case you will pass out and your body will start breathing normally. So when you reach the state when you really cannot keep it any longer, put your hands away, open your eyes, gazing at the sigil while exhaling what was kept for so long, then immediately close your eyes and while you are grasping for air, banish with laughter.

Another death posture goes as follows:
Stand still with your back pushing against the wall, hand should be connected behind your back, make sure all dangerous items are moved away from your proximity, else you might hit your head. Speaking of preparations, you are most probably going to fall down on the floor so preparing some soft "landing spot" might be a good idea.

Close your eyes and start breathing as deep and as fast as possible, breathe faster and faster till you become really dizzy, you will know when that moments appear. Then quickly take a very deep inhale, hold your breath and stretch your whole body as much as possible, while doing that, visualize your sigil or if it is a sigil mantra or a word of power, say it in your mind. This combination of over-breathing and stretching out while holding your breath will most likely cause a massive overload during which you will hit the "reset button" and wake up few seconds later on the floor. That's why it is a good idea to have a supervisor for this death posture, someone who will hold your body and slowly help it to the floor once you black out.

It's time to share some dangerous death postures. First one is simple, you won't go to sleep for a specific amount of days, usually 5 to 10 will do the trick. The point is to get to the state when you start hallucinating. At that point your psychic censor is very weakened and just by focusing at the sigil you can charge it. Of course once again banish with laughter.

Now we are getting at the grail of dangerous death postures, this one can actually kill you from the massive overload, a partner is needed for this one and I really advise not to even try this one. So, you are tied to a bed, a scarf or something is used to block your sight and your hearing. That scarf is the only thing you have on, except that you are completely naked. Your goal in the beginning is to maditate while your partner stimulates you to bring you to the verge of orgasm and then stops, then again and stops, this goes on and on for hours. This process will completely exhaust you and you will start having hallucinations, at that point you should visualize your sigil or say it in your mind when it is a sigil mantra or a word of power. Then you give a sign to your partner for a "release".

I think I may have overdone an explanation for the last one when I said in the beginning I will only mention the most dangerous ones, but there are a few ways how to "spice up" this death posture a little bit that I am not going to mention.


Now, let's finish this with a very simple and kinda silly death posture. Simply spin in circles so you become so dizzy you fall down to the floor, there, while your head is still spinning, visualize or say your sigil, then banish with laughter. There, really simple, really silly, not very effective, but pretty much fun. You can of course combine different key elements of death postures we have already talked about and come with something new, don't be scared to experiment, just be reasonable, practice safely and have fun, lots and lots of fun.

Tuesday, 3 February 2015

Liber Azag: The Book of Sigils - part 1

So I figured out I didn't post any new article in a while so I decided to share what is finished so far from the book of sigils I am currently working on. So, sorry, this post is going to be quite long :D

Introduction
Since ancient times there was a belief in the power of symbolism, a belief that a certain image, certain word and certain posture executed in a certain time can cause a certain outcome. Origins of these symbols were usually an inheritance or a complex sets of mathematics and geometry, combined with mysticism. Some of these paradigms of deriving symbols were so complicated that only a person trained within this paradigm the whole life could execute such operation. Then one person came with a completely different perspective, this person was Austin Osman Spare.

Spare had a very non-traditional and fresh opinion regarding symbology, according to him you didn't need a complex calculation and the knowledge of position of all the planets in the Chaldean sequence. According to him all you needed was a desire, this desire was then converted into a symbol to alienate it for the conscious mind, and make it more available for the unconsciousness.

Now we know, that unconsciousness is rather a symbol based than sentence based, a phrase is simply too chaotic for our unconscious selves, it contains words with multiple meanings, some of these can also be easily lost during the process of migration, but a symbol is whole, a symbol says it all, totally, without any losses, without any omitted words, a symbol is a reference link to what we want the most, a symbol is the most honest thing in the universe.

A symbol is also something that keeps invading our minds, symbols are everywhere. When you e.g. hear about McDonald's, a symbol will appear right in front of your mind's eye, this symbol can be the M logo it can also be one of your favorite burgers, or, if you are into "healthy" diet, you will think about fat people and conservants. There is the association between the symbol and meaning, the reference link between the two.

When you make the sigil yourself, through whatever technique you choose, you are not creating only the sigil, but also the reference link between the sigil and your desire. The sigil in itself is not important, it's its connection to the meaning that counts, after all, you don't want to pass a meaningless symbol to your unconsciousness, you want your desire to be fulfilled.

Historically speaking, sigils are nothing new, they existed way before Spare, they just weren't made by meshing letters together. Gematria, planetary tables, rose croix, nine chambers, possession drawings, these all were used just to draw sigils, not even speaking about audial sigils (mantras) or gesturial sigils (mudra), even asanas (body postures) are sigils.

In our every day life we use a lot of symbolism, clothes we wear, our ethnicity, how white teeth we have, how expensive watches we possess, these all we use to create some image, this image is the symbol of us, when someone thinks about us, this is the image he sees, at least when we are lucky. It happens that our self-perception and the perception by others is slightly off, that's normal, if it is off a little bit more, we have a problem, because people give a different definition to ourselves, one we may not be satisfied with. If a company, or a celebrity has an unpleasant image, one that doesn't bring the bright future, this image is changed. A company changes the name, replaces the CEO, puts more money into PR. A celebrity buys new clothes, changes haircut, appears on some show, that's how it's done.

One could say that Spare didn't invent the Sigil Magick. Firstly he himself claimed to be taught by another person, secondly we as a mankind has a tendency to overcomplicate stuff. It is very probable that sigil magick started in its pure form thousands of years ago and new generations then started attaching more requirements to it, like planetary correspondences, elements, deities, ceremonies, we really tend to do that, especially when our effort fails. Many people use this form of thinking: "The recent sigil didn't work, so maybe I did something different from before, maybe one has to be turned into the correct cardinal direction or it's in the day, last successful day was Saturday, maybe it works better on Saturdays". And new successes and new failures attach more and more rules to the mechanics, when the truth might be that you simply used a wrong intention, maybe it doesn't work at all or maybe it does something you haven't intended or you are somehow ignoring the real execution of your spell. This was one advice given to me by Patrick Dunn when I told him I never had much success with money magick. He told me to make a sigil to be more receptive in receiving money. That method worked like a charm and I was thinking about why, does being more receptive to something makes it come true?

Now I think the culprit was hidden somewhere else, my previous spells did work, not as flashy as finding $100 on the street the very next day, but they did work, I was just ignoring the indications, I was simply apathetic to what was happening all around me.

Mechanics of Sigil Magick
It's time to describe the basic procedures of Sigil Magick, first of all, how does Sigil Magick really work? In Magick there are generally these following paradigms as described by Frater U. D.:
  1. Energetic paradigm - everything is energy, different frequencies of energy cause different results
  2. Information paradigm - everything is information, everything is symbology, by manipulating our own internal symbology we can affect the symbology of the world
  3. Psychology paradigm - all the Magick is caused by our psyche, by our unconsciousness.
  4. Spirit paradigm - everything is governed by spirits, each action, event or item has its own spirit, we can communicate with them through the use of symbology
  5. Meta paradigm - all previous paradigms are sorta true. There is an internal mechanic of Magick we cannot comprehend, but we can use it by either of the previous paradigms.

Now we can speak about the procedure, the most basic one is to state a desire, sigilize, and then either fire and forget, or charge it for a pro longed period of time. For a fire and forget one has to enter the state of gnosis and pass the symbol to the unconscious part of our mind (as the psychology paradigm would explain it). The thing is that during the gnosis our psychic censor is deactivated so we can pass the information directly into our unconsciousness without any filtering. Then we have to forget about our desire else the psychic censor might figure it out after being re-activated and stop the execution.

Dynamic charging means using the sigil for a pro-longed period of time, e.g. for focal meditation. We have already described the fire and forget method as bypassing the psychic censor behind his back. In that case using the dynamic charging is like beating him repeatedly with a stick, till our desire is fulfilled. It is quite obvious that this method won't be as fast as the fire and forget, but internal mechanics are easier, more accessible, and are also useful for a more complex tasks where a couple of factors must fit together to bring our desired change. There is also another difference and that is in the behavior of a sigil itself.

A one time sigil used via fire and forget method is a no-brainer, you wish for a change and the change will more or less manifest. Dynamic charging where you use the same sigil over and over again can bring the sigil to the life, in that case the sigil gets a consciousness on its own, one needed for executing the task, this conscious symbol is then called a servitor.

Servitors can be created through a dynamic charging or methods I will describe later. The conscious creation of the servitor is better as it gives us better control over its intent and also expiration. The expiration is also an important factor, as we want to have the count of our servitors in check. The servitor is usually programmed to expire till a certain date or till his task is completed. Sometimes we also need servitors with no expiration date, but more about that later.

We have already spoken about internal mechanics of Sigil Magick, but what about its uses? What are sigils good for? Well, you can use sigils to get a raise, to win the heart of your chosen partner, to improve your memory, learn things faster, get rid of your habits, heal faster, get rid of bad dreams, bless your family or friends or even add few rare pieces to your vase collection. Sigil Magick is good for anything as long as there is any chance for it happening, as an example, you won't become an US president when you were born outside the United States or you will never look into the space unless you are in a good position to be an astronaut.

You can also use sigils for vague stuff like happiness, luck, feeling of unity or inner peace, but keep in mind that vague desires have vague results and result is everything that Sigil Magick is about. In Sigil Magick it is a good idea to keep your work in the journal together with the records of your results, your successes and failures will help you to figure out your personal system of working with sigils, just remember, don't overcomplicate it like our ancestors did.

Specifying the desire
Before we do anything in Magick, we have to set what our ideal goal should be. For that matter it is good to ask yourself questions like "What do I want to change about my life?" or "What do I want to experience?". Once you got some basic idea, close your eyes, relax and imagine yourself in the situation when you already got what you wanted. Think whether this outcome is really what you want, think about what could go wrong or right in that situation, if you find a possible problem with that, modify the situation a little bit and repeat. Do so till you find the desire with a perfect outcome, one that you are completely satisfied with.

Once the desire is specified and we are completely ok with it, it is time to formulate the desire statement. Austing Osman Spare used an example of THIS MY WILL TO OBTAIN STRENGTH OF THE TIGER. Spare generally believed that using some immutable part of the sentence like THIS MY WILL TO helps to get accomodated to the process and bring better, faster and more accurate results. You can off course follow his example and build the desire statement his way, but first let me tell you what I personally find ineffective on that method and why.

First of all, that method uses an immutable part of the sentence, more and more sigils you make, more unique your approach will be, unfortunately you will also develop a design which will appear in all your sigils because of this part, so your sigils will be less unique and your unconsciousness will have more troubles distinguishing between them. Secondly this method defines a desire, not truth. Saying this my will is similar to I wish, wishing something doesn't mean will become true.

I personally prefer the concept that Bardon introduces in IIH regarding affirmation. An affirmation should be in present tense and formulated as if the desire was already fulfilled, like it was always true, so e.g. instead of "I will quit smoking" or "This my will to quit smoking" it should be "I don't smoke". Many people also prefer the V-Prime model, where words like "to be" are omitted, so instead of "storm is gone" you simply write "storm gone", this simplifies the sigilzation process too, as there are less letters to work with.

You might also ask why is it important to write the desire in present tense. If you specify the desire for the future, your unconsciousness will have time to intervene with the result, the psychic censor will naturally try to stop the work. But, as Bardon states in IIH, if you make your unconsciousness to lose the sence of time and space, it will have no way of stopping your desire.

Sigilize your intent
Now it's time to sigilize our desire to alienate it from our conscious mind and let it slip past the psychic censor to our unconsciousness. There are many sigilization methods but let's speak about the most traditional one for now, meshing the letters together to create an image. Many people start this process by crossing out repeating letters first, so each letter is present only once in the desire statement, but you can omit this process, simply don't draw each letter more than once and frankly, if you find any letter in the sigil that you still didn't draw consciously, you can omit it too, as it is already present.

Let's use some example now, e.g.
STORM GONE

First we ca draw a circle, representing O.

Then if we draw short line inside, touching the border of the circle, we will get both T and G.

We can then turn this short line into a lightning, giving us both N and S.

All that is missing now are letters E, R and M. M can be drawn as E, which helps us to kill two flies with one hit.

Now all we need to do is to add R to the sigil and our work is nearly done.

Now we can continue in our artistic work, adding new shapes to the sigil. Triangles, crosses, petals, pentagrams, planetary symbology, anything we feel appropriate for fulfilling our desire and alienating it further from our consciousness.

We can of course make the sigil in different sequence, directly from the desire, starting with S and ending with E, this method then creates more open ends which can be decorated with occult symbology.

There is no right or wrong way of how the sigil should look like, the only key aspect is to do what works for you, as the time passes, you will create your own personalized design which will work the best for you, everything is in practice, so don't be scared to try new things, through failure we can learn what is the best approach for us.

Pictorial method
Another method used for the sigilization is the pictorial method. You simply draw a sigil based on the stated desire and then you derive a sigil from it. This method is commonly used for healing of another person, you draw a person, usually with initials of the person you want to heal and you draw a needle aiming at the part that should be healed. After the drawing part is done, you then continue simplifying and reshaping the picture till you get the sigil.

Another type of pictorial sigilization is automatic drawing, also heavily advocated by Spare. For this method you need a quiet space where you can relax. Meditate for a moment to calm your mind, then place your hand with a pen on a piece of paper, close your eyes and think about your desire, let your hand to move automatically, drawing on the paper.

Once you fel you are done (or after some time you have specified) put your pen aside and look carefully at the drawn picture. You should notice some part that feels like being associated to your desire, extract it from the drawing and decorate it as needed, e.g. add planetary symbology and close it within a circle. Once again I suggest that there is no right or wrong design of the sigil, this can't be stressed enough.

Mantra method
Another method is the mantra method. In this case you don't create a picture, but rather a sequence of sounds that you repeat again and again during the meditation (like a Sanskrit mantra). Let's use the storm example again:
STORM GONE

One way of creating the mantra is to write the words backwards, adding or removing letters to make it more readable:
MEROTIS NOG

This mantra is a bit hard for chanting, so let's modify it a bit more:
MEROTIZ NOGEY

This one is better for chanting.

Another method is to write are desire phonetically, which won't work in this case as the difference between STORM and its phonetic version is zero to none. But what we can do is to get rid of all AEIOU's and mesh the rest together:
STRMGN

Now we can add additional letters for the readability:
SETORIMAGANA

and split the mantra in separate words for readability:
SE TORI MAGANA

So, we have described two separate ways of sigil mantra creation which gave us two separate versions of the mantra, MEROTIZ NOGEY and SE TORI MAGANA, whether we like method A or method B, let's see how the mantra can be used, for that purpose I choose SE TORI MAGANA as that is my personal favorite in this case.

  1. Sit comfortably in a dim lit room and close your eyes.
  2. One by one, stretch all your muscles for the time of 5 seconds and then relax them
  3. Feel the heat slowly filling your body, your body becomes hotter and hotter.
  4. Feel how your body becomes heavier and heavier with each exhale.
  5. Turn your eyes up to look at the place between your eye brows, keep them this way for the rest of this exercise.
  6. Your breathing should be deep and calm, but still natural. Observe your breathing till you start hearing the buzzing sound. That's called Nada, it's a sign that you have entered the lower form of trance.
  7. Now comes the tricky part, vibrating your mantra. Let's use our SE TORI MAGANA example here. Your mind should be one syllable before your tongue, so when in the head you say SE, you're silent, when your mind is at TO you start vibrating SE, when your mind is at RI you start vibrating TO, etc.
  8. Repeat step 7 for a couple of minutes or stop when the time seems right.

If the purpose of the mantra is to bring in a certain vision or an experience in a dream state, you can repeat the mantra silently in your mind till you fall asleep, this is also useful for mantras that should help you to break bad habits. You can also turn your mantra into a word of power and focus on it during orgasm.

To turn a mantra into a word of power, you ca simply take the first syllables of the mantra words and join them together. So in case of SE TORI MAGANA it would be SETOMA, you can of course use any method of word of power creation you want, just turn the whole mantra into one word.


The mantra and a word of power can be also used for the creation of the servitor, where the word of power would be the servitor's name and the sigil mantra would be his activation formula, but more about that in the chapter about servitors.

Thursday, 22 January 2015

About Crowley's addiction

A lot of controversial information is known about Crowley and when anyone mentions his name, people frequently mention his addiction to heroin and opiates. Like this was the cover that hides all his successes, qualities and truly iron dedication to the occult.

The problem is that Aleister Crowley was many things, but not a druggie. Opiates (including heroin) weren't illicit drugs in his time, they were drugs prescribed by doctors for the cure of things like asthma, stress, depression, diarrhea. It was much later when medical society recognized heroin's side effects as too horrible to be an official cure, but some anti-diarrhea drugs still contain a minimal amount of heroin.

Crowley also mentioned his addiction quite frequently in his notes, he used heroin for a longer period of time, so he was very addicted to it on a physiological level. According to his notes he was trying to fight this addiction on a regular basis, but heroin is a very horrible enemy of the will when it comes to side effects. The will was also one of the reasons why Crowley fought his addiction, he did believe that anything that controls or limits your will should be gotten rid of. Unfortunately his addiction was too strong, he didn't free himself from the drugs for his entire life.

Ancestry work

I keep hearing about the importance of ancestry work in Magick, about how it is the gate into Magick itself.

Come on, people, Crowley didn't do any ancestry work, same goes for Papus, Levi, Spare. Yet all of them were pretty skilled and powerful magi.

If your paradigm counts with ancestors then yes, they are important in your practice, for other paradigms, not so much. The thing is we all are different individuals with different practices, there is no key concept that would be same for all of us, some venerate ancestors, some worship deities, some conjure demons, some draw stuff on a piece of paper, and everyone can obtain the power.

Tuesday, 20 January 2015

Bad omens: continuation

So, people following me for some time know about a post from 9th of January where I was talking about 2 bad omens, a dream about a 5 legged horse and a shattered glass that fell on me during a bus trip to work.

If I think about it now, the meaning of these omens was pretty obvious. Regarding the 5 legged horse it meant the additional leg, something useless that must be removed. Regarding the shattered window my very first thought was: "Damn, that driver will most certainly be fired".

So, here is a continuation of what happened next. This Friday (16th of January) I had a pretty bad argument with my manager, so bad that I was seriously considering to curse him. The argument itself appeared repeatedly in my mind, always partially dragging me into the mental battle. This ended up callin BANRABISHU a couple of times during the weekend.

On Monday I have finally decided to do something about it, so I make a sigil, but not to screw my manager but to simply improve my work situation. Today we have found out there was a big firing going on, 7 people were kicked out of the company. Now, I am a very strongly convinced that I was meant to be one of those fired guys, but only thanks to these 3 omens (including the argument with my manager) I was able to avoid it before even figuring out the real meaning of these omens, but really in the last minute.

It's really strange, on Friday I were like the biggest enemies with my manager and today he was acting completely normal, maybe it really was just another omen, meant to finally push me into action before it's too late.